Game Of All

Rya, you must design the ultimate free-roaming Game of All, where you pilot a sentient ship who must eat other ships to stay alive and gain power, but can also date other male and female ships (your ship is omnisexual) by matching the correct gifts and choosing proper conversation topics. These gifts can be won by annihilating entire worlds (for a rare flower, for example) through galactic conquest, during which you control your armies from the grand strategy scale all the way down to the tactical level. During these battles you can switch from horizontal to vertical scrolling, weaving your way through bullet-hell to single-handedly turn the tide of battle. You can also exit your ship at remote outposts to find out you’re actually some kind of space platypus who can win collectible items by playing Tringo and Pachinko, or kill space-hookers to earn extra cash with which you can buy furniture to decorate the interior of your ship in an elaborate feng-shui, free-form puzzle mode. By finding your place amongst the people, you can eventually clone yourself and be elected mayor of a small town (your clone will be the opposite gender of whatever you chose while customizing your first platypus-avatar). Your clone construct roads and waterways, building your town into a bustling metropolis and fending off Mecha Godzilla attacks by growing to giant size and going best of three rounds in one-on-one versus combat, making full use of a deep fighting system that includes false roman canceling and carefully timed parries. All the while, your moral actions will determine the fate of the galaxy as you struggle against several competing ancient prophecies. Should you succeed in fully subjugating the galaxy, your two platypi will mate to produce an omipotent and retarded god emperor. The children of your sentient spaceship will act as his attendants, and can be configured to one of thirteen battle formations and assigned seven different behavioral modifiers. It’s then that you discover that… The whole game was simply the spice-induced dream of that angry retarded god’s proto-fetus… THE PLAYER. At this point I think the game might become a first-person shooter set in the birth canal… but you probably know better than I do.

–Zepyulos im Insert Credit-Forum